Alan's Assistant transcript
Prologue: The Word on the Street segment Murray: "Hey, so what's the word on the street?" Young Boy: "Assistant." Murray: "Can 1 of you give me a definition of the word assistant?" Young Girl: "An assistant is a person who helps another person in the need of help and assistance." Murray: "Now you all remember the word assistant." Scene 1: The arbor Maria: "Oh hi there," Luis: "welcome to Sesame Street," Gordon: "today's a super excitin' day," Susan: "'cause somebody new has just moved in today." Ernie: "Oh really?" Bert: "who is it?" Telly: "who could it be?" Baby Bear: "tell us." Gordon: "Well, you guys, it seems to all of us that Mr. Hooper has just moved in today, isn't that absolutely right, Big Bird?" Big Bird gets a surprised look on his face. Big Bird: "But wait just 1 minute, you guys, Mr. Hooper passed away 39 years ago and he's not coming back here, how can he simply be coming back here?" Bob: "Well, Big Bird, it's actually a different Mr. Hooper. James Hooper," Luis: "and he was the late Mr. Hooper's nephew and he's also Alan's new assistant." Big Bird: "Oh boy," Snuffy: "we definitely have a new and improved Mr. Hooper in town." The Sesame Street human and Muppet friends walk right over to Hooper's Store where they're being greeted by the late Mr. Hooper's nephew, James Hooper who's working in the exact same position as his father and uncle as well. Gina: "Hey, Luis, Maria, Big Bird and everybody," Carlo: "you're just in time, James, also known as the new and improved Mr. Hooper just got in today." Alan and James walk right outta Hooper's Store to greet their good friends. Alan: "Hello and good morning to all of you," James: "Alan and I are super excited about living and working here, but you know, I always knew that 1 day I would end up assisting him in my late father and later my late uncle's store. Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry banana and birdseed milkshakes for all of you." Cheering In Excitement Elmo: "Hi there, James, nice meeting you, Elmo's Elmo, and this is Abby, this is Julia and this is Rudy." James: "Hey, nice meeting all of you as well too." Another cartoon segment: Ladybugs' Picnic New Male Singer: 1, 2, 3 4, 5, 6 7, 8, 9 10, 11, 12 Ladybugs came '' ''to the ladybugs' picnic New Male Singer (continued): 1, 2, 3 4, 5, 6 7, 8, 9 10, 11, 12 and they all played games at the ladybugs' picnic New Male Singer: they had twelve sacks '' ''so they ran sack races they fell on their backs '' ''and they fell on their faces the ladybugs 12 at the ladybugs' picnic New Male Singer: they played jump rope '' ''but the rope '' ''it broke so they just sat around '' ''telling knock-knock jokes the ladybugs 12 at the ladybugs' picnic New Male Singer (continued): 1, 2, 3 4, 5, 6 7, 8, 9 10, 11, 12 and they chatted away at the ladybugs' picnic New Male Singer: they talked about the high price '' ''of furniture and rugs and fire insurance for ladybugs the ladybugs 12 at the ladybugs' picnic 12.... Inside Hooper's Store Big Bird's sipping right on his birdseed milkshake while James approaches him. Alan: "What seems to be the matter, Big Bird?" James: "not enjoying much of your birdseed milkshake?" Big Bird: "Oh it's yummy good, thanks a bunch, but I'm a bit confused." James: "About what?" Big Bird: "I don't know whether to call you the new and improved Mr. Hooper or to call you James or not." Alan: "Well that's super confusing," James: "you see? my late father, Arnold Hooper was called Mr. Hooper and my late Uncle Harold Hooper was also called Mr. Hooper and so am I." Big Bird: "Oh yeah, that's a bit confusing to me." James: "I'll tell you what, Big Bird, you can call me James, but you can also call me Mr. Hooper if you feel like it." Big Bird: "Wow, James.......I mean.......Mr. Hooper, that's super thrilling." James: "We know, Big Bird," Alan: "we're super thrilled you think so." Another Muppet Song: The Tortellini Song Baby Sister Monster: In Delight Big Sister Monster: There's only 1 word '' ''my baby sister can say Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: she keeps repeating it day after day Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: so I'm gonna teach her another word 1 that I bet she never heard tortellini, tortellini, tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tortellini, tortellini, tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: it's Italian '' ''1 can eat it you can say it just repeat tortellini, tortellini, tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tortellini, tortellini, tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tort, tort, torte Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: lini Baby Sister Monster: "Mama." Big Sister Monster: tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Ini." Big Sister Monster: "Wow, she said it," Big Sister Monster: I was sure that she could do it (spoken) "Everybody, once together." All Sesame Street Muppet Monsters: tortellini, tortellini, tortellini Baby Sister Monster: "Ini." All Sesame Street Muppet Monsters: tortellini, tortellini tortellini, tortellini tor, tor, tor-tellini Baby Sister Monster: "Ini. Mama." All Sesame Street Muppet Monsters: "Awwww." Green Muppet Monster: "I knew we should've tried raviolis." Baby Sister Monster: "Tortellini." Baby Sister Monster: Again Gloria Globe Segment: A chicken from Des Moines, Iowa Gloria Globe Announcer: "Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Gloria Globe will now attempt to pull a rabbit out of her hat, as you can see, the hat is completely empty." Gasping In Excitement Gloria Globe: Ta-daaaaa, "a rabbit." Gloria Globe looks right into her magic cap for the rabbit. Gloria Globe: "I know he's in here someplace." Gloria Globe pulls a certain critter out with bright white feathers, a bright red waddle, a bright orange beak and bright orange feet. It's a female chicken. Gloria Globe: "Whooooooooa!" Gloria Globe is right next to the chicken. Gloria Globe: "Wait, you're not a rabbit, you're a chicken." Chicken: Loudly Gloria Globe: "You don't belong here, you belong in Des Moines, Iowa." Chicken: In Surprise Gloria Globe: "Don't worry about it, I know where Des Moines, Iowa is located." Gloria Globe shows the chicken Des Moines, Iowa's location spot. Gloria Globe: "That's better, now I wonder where that rabbit could be." The rabbit shows up right outta Gloria Globe's magic cap. ''Sesame Street News Flash'': Goldilocks and the 4 Bears Sesame Street News Flash Announcer: "We take you now to Kermit the Frog for a fast breaking news story." Reporter Kermit: "Oh boy, look at those 3 chairs and 1 high chair there, and 4 bowls and 4 spoons as well. Throat oh hi there, Kermit here, reporting live from the 4 bears house, in the story of Goldilocks and the 4 Bears, over here, there's Mama Bear," Mama Bear: "Hi there." Reporter Kermit: "Papa Bear," Papa Bear: "Good to see you." Reporter Kermit: "Baby Bear." Baby Bear: "What a tewwific day to see youw face again." Reporter Kermit: "and Curly Bear." Curly Bear: "Excited, excited, excited." Reporter Kermit: "They're the 4 bears, they're on the lookout for Goldilocks. so tell me, bears, what's the news you wanna tell me about?" Baby Bear: "Well, Kewmit, we got supew tiwed of Goldilocks eating ouw powwidge and messing awound with our fuwnituwe aww the time," Papa Bear: "So we're making an extra bowl of porridge for her just in case we invite her over." Reporter Kermit: "Oh wow, that sure sounds like a super good idea." Mama Bear: "It sure is." Ringing Reporter Kermit: "Oh look," Papa Bear: "that must be Goldilocks right now," Mama Bear: "and I got just an extra chair for her just in case Baby Bear's chair gets broken again." Baby Bear opens the door to greet Goldilocks. Baby Bear: "Hi thewe, Goldilocks, you'we just in time to join us fow ouw bweakfast meal." Goldilocks: "Why thanks a bunch, Baby Bear, now I don't need to mess around with anything at all." Goldilocks sits right in her seat and they all enjoy their breakfast meals while Curly Bear enjoys her other breakfast meal. Reporter Kermit: "Well that's all the time we have for today, and this is Kermit, your official news reporter, signing off." Detective Elmo segment: The Cookie Case ''(Andy Warthog) Elmo/Detective Elmo: ''Detective Elmo: The Cookie Case. Announcer: "A cookie painting's been stolen from the museum, and the guards think Cookie Monster did it." Cookie Monster: "Oh dear, me been framed!" Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Cookie Monster's not a criminal, and Detective Elmo can prove it, but Elmo's gonna need your help to look for clues, oh hold on, Elmo just needs to put on his detective disguise, (he puts on a pair of Groucho Marx glasses.) okay, let's go." Elmo/Detective Elmo goes right inside the museum building and he sees a chicken spy looking for something suspicious. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "What's that chicken looking for? it must be 1 of the thief's spies, a wicked chicken, wait 'til the chicken's not looking, then we can move right over to the next square platform." The chicken spy walks around and Elmo/Detective Elmo moves right over to the next square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Let's get to the next square platform." Elmo/Detective Elmo moves right over to the next square platform then the final square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "We finally did it, but wait, there's more wicked chickens, we must be near some clues, let's move to the next square platform." Elmo/Detective Elmo moves right over to the next square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Let's keep going." Elmo/Detective Elmo moves from 1 square platform to another square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "We made it, but look, even more wicked chickens." Elmo/Detective Elmo moves right over to a square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Let's get to the next square platform." Elmo/Detective Elmo moves right over to the next square platform and another square platform. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Yahahay! we finally did it, nice work, detective." Elmo/Detective Elmo's now in the clues room. Elmo/Detective Elmo takes off his detective disguise. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Great job getting past those wicked chickens, A Bit but how are we gonna find the criminal? boy, if only Elmo had a clue." The letter clue is revealed to be the letter W. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Oh? what's this? it's a clue: the letter W." Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Watch: it's a clue, watermelon: another clue, let's find 1 more clue, signal whistle, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, we found all of the clues that begin with the letter W, okay, we found the clues, but how are we gonna find the criminal?" A female security penguin gives Elmo/Detective Elmo some photographs of what the criminal might look like. Female Security Penguin: A Bit Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Oh? what's this? oh, oh, photos from the security camera? oh thanks a bunch, Ms. Penguin Guard." Female Security Penguin: A Bit Again Elmo/Detective Elmo: "The criminal must be in 1 of these photographs, choose the photograph's that got all of our clues." Andy Warthog's revealed to be the criminal. Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Oh yeah, that photograph shows all of the exact same clues, the criminal must be......Andy Warthog, way to go, you cracked the case." Announcer: "The thief, Andy Warthog, admits to stealing the cookie painting, Cookie Monster's free at last." Elmo/Detective Elmo: "Yehehes! great work, detective, Elmo couldn't have done it without you." Muppet and Celebrity Segment: The Guest Star and Grover explain the word assistant. Guest Star: "Hi there, I'm (Guest Star's 1st Name)," Grover: "and I'm Grover." Guest Star: "Today, we're gonna explain to you the word assistant." Grover: "An assistant is a person who helps you out wherever you go." Guest Star: "That's exactly right, so right now, Grover here, is gonna help me sort out these square and triangle blocks by size." Grover: "The square blocks go right in the square box and the triangle blocks go right in the triangle box." Guest Star: "Good assisting and remembering, Grover, let's do it." Grover and the Guest Star put the square blocks right in the square box and the triangle blocks right in the triangle box. Guest: "Perfect, now we understand the word assistant." = Another Muppet Song: Farley sings In My Book In Background Farley: There's a tiger in my book and a lion '' ''in my book Farley (continued): there's a sneaky '' ''alligator I can spy on in my book Farley: sometimes all I need is a '' ''book to read Farley (continued): there are '' ''pirates in my book on an ocean in my book Farley: there's a sorcerer with secret magic potions in my book Farley (continued): and to learn where the stories '' ''will lead I just read Farley: on a '' ''quiet day I could go '' ''outside '' ''and play Farley (continued): but there's adventure '' ''in my book so exciting '' ''in my book turn the pages see the pictures read the writing in my book yes sometimes all I need is a book to read. Elmo's World segment: Soap Music In Background Elmo: La, di, da, do la, di, da, do Elmo's World la, di, da, do la, di, da, do Elmo's World Continues In Background Elmo: Elmo loves his goldfish his crayon too that's Elmo's World. Elmo: "Hi there, welcome to Elmo's world, Elmo's super thrilled to see you, and so's Dorothy, say hello, Dorothy." (A brief pause.) Dorothy's swimming around in her goldfish bowl in response. Elmo: A Bit "Guess what Elmo's thinking about today, ya-da-da-da!" Elmo notices some pictures of soap dispensers and soap bars everywhere. Elmo goes right over to his door and tries to open it, but his right hand slips right off it. Elmo: "Boy, you're slippery, Door." Elmo opens his door and succeeds and sees some people washing themselves with water and soap. Elmo: "That's exactly right, soap, you know, soap." A film montage of some young kids, teens and grownups young and old washing themselves with water and soap. Elmo: "Dorothy's been thinking about soap too, (he looks right at Dorothy who's still swimming around in her goldfish bowl.) what's that, Dorothy? oh, Dorothy has a question, what do you do with soap? good question, Dorothy, let's ask Mr. Noodle, Mr. Noodle!" Elmo goes right over to his shade. Elmo: "Open up, please, Shade." Elmo opens up his shade and sees Mr. Noodle. Elmo: "Hi, Mr. Noodle, Dorothy has a question for you, what do you do with soap?" Young Boy Kid (off screen): "Show us what you do with soap." Mr. Noodle tries drawing pictures with a bar of soap. Young Girl Kid (off screen): "No, you can't draw pictures with it," Elmo: "you need to either wash your hands or your entire body." Young Boy Kid (off screen): "Mr. Noodle, get it to a faucet." Young Kids (off screen): "Try again, Mr. Noodle." Mr. Noodle tries juggling the soap. Elmo: "Mr. Noodle," Young Girl Kid (off screen): "you can't juggle it," Young Boy Kid (off screen): "what do you do with it in a shower tub or a faucet?" Mr. Noodle takes the soap right over to a faucet and begins washing his hands with it. Young Girl Kid (off screen): "Alright, you finally did it," Young Boy Kid (off screen): "great job, Mr. Noodle," Elmo: "You're washing your hands with soap." Mr. Noodle finishes washing his hands and dries them off with a towel. Elmo: "Oh that Mr. Noodle, his hands are soapy, say that again, Dorothy? oh okay, Dorothy wants to ask someone else, what do you do with soap?" Cut to some young kids showing Dorothy what they do with soap. Another Young Boy Kid: "Dorothy, I use a bar of soap when I take a shower bath." The young boy kid begins washing himself with a bar of soap. Another Young Girl Kid: "Dorothy, I use a soap dispenser when I wash my hands. The young girl kid begins washing her hands with soap from a soap dispenser. Elmo: "Thanks a bunch, everybody, and now, Elmo will ask a baby." Elmo walks right over to a baby boy who's got a dolphin soap dispenser that's closed for safety. Elmo: "Hi there, baby." (Another brief pause.) Elmo: "Baby, what do you do with soap?" (Another brief pause.) Elmo: "Oh thank you, baby." Elmo: A Bit Elmo: "Elmo always remembers to wash his hands or take a shower bath with soap, but right now-" Male Computer Voice: "Elmo has mail, Elmo has mail, Elmo has mail," Elmo: "Stop, Computer, Elmo wants his e-mail." Elmo stops his computer screen from walking around. Male Computer Voice: "Elmo has mail." Elmo opens a video e-mail of Ernie with Rubber Ducky in the bathtub. Elmo: "Oh look, it's Elmo's good friend, Ernie." Ernie: "Hi there, Elmo, I'm in the bathtub with Rubber Ducky and a bar of soap to clean myself up." Elmo: "Oh wow, so Ernie uses soap when he takes a nice warm bath with Rubber Ducky." Ernie: Rubber Ducky "What's that, Rubber Ducky? oh, Elmo, Rubber Ducky says he knows a lot about soap too." Elmo: "Thanks a bunch, Ernie." Ernie: "You're welcome, Elmo." Elmo turns off the video e-mail. Elmo: "And now, Elmo has a question fooooor you, how many soap bubbles are coming right outta this soap dispenser? let's count them and find out." Elmo and Young Kids: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12." Elmo: "12 soap bubbles, nice counting, that makes Elmo wonder, what uses soap? and what doesn't use soap? Elmo wants to know about it, don't you? okay." Elmo tries opening his drawer. Drawer: Gibberish Language Elmo: "It sure does sound like the drawer knows about soap, open yourself up, Drawer." The drawer opens up and some do and don't pictures of soap appear on the television screen. Elmo (off screen): "Do birthday cakes use soap?" Young Kids: "No." Elmo (off screen): "But you can get a soap doll making kit for a birthday gift." Elmo (off screen): "Do cats use soap?" Young Kids: "No." Elmo (off screen): "That's exactly right, they lick their furs clean." Elmo (off screen): "Do pigs use soap?" Young Kids: "No." Elmo (off screen): "Right again, they take mud baths to cool themselves off." Elmo (off screen): "Does Baby Bear use soap?" Young Kids: "Yes." Elmo (off screen): "He uses soap when he's taking a nice warm bath." Baby Bear: "Behold, a nice baw of soap." The drawer closes. Elmo: "Elmo wants to learn more about soap? but how can Elmo find out more? maybe the television screen can help, turn yourself on, TV." The television screen turns itself on and The Soap Channel comes right on. Elmo: "Oh yeah, we can watch The Soap Channel." Soap Channel Announcer: "The Soap Channel, all soap all the time, and now, The Young Boy who Really Loved Soap." Male Narrator: Once there was a young boy who really loved soap." Cartoon Animated Young Boy: "I really love soap." Male Narrator: He really loved soap more than anything, he washed his hands with a soap dispenser, washed himself with a bar of soap and even made soap dolls himself." Cartoon Animated Young Boy: "Everybody knows making soap dolls is super easy." Soap Channel Announcer: "Coming up next on The Soap Channel, The Good, the Bad and the Soapy." Elmo: "Oh thanks a bunch, TV, wow, there's lots of things to know about soap, but Elmo wants to find out more." Elmo opens his door and a talking bar of soap shows up. Talking Bar of Soap: "Wanna talk to a bar of soap?" Elmo: "Oh yeah, we can talk to a bar of soap, tell Elmo more about soap, Mr. Soap Bar." Talking Bar of Soap: "Well you see, you use a bar of soap for taking a shower bath or a soap dispenser for washing your hands and making soap dolls with it." Elmo: "Oh look, Dorothy's imagining Elmo working at a soap doll factory." Dorothy's imagination: Various soap clips Elmo: "The soap dolls are all prepared!" Talking Bar of Soap: "It's important to use a bar of soap like me, when you take a shower bath." Elmo: "Getting clean here." Talking Bar of Soap: "Soap can also be used for dish washing." Elmo: "Oh boy, these dishes are getting clean real fast." End of Dorothy's imagination...... Elmo: "Wow, so that's how soap's used in many different ways." Talking Bar of Soap: "It's true, Elmo, in fact, I'm gonna go scrub the counter tops in the kitchen, see ya." Elmo: "Take good care of yourself, Mr. Soap Bar." The talking bar of soap exits Elmo's universe. Elmo: "Elmo's good friends, Kathy and Carl help 1 another wash dishes with lots of soap,and they told Elmo all about it." Live Film: Kathy and Carl washing dishes with lots of soap Kathy (off screen): "I'm 10 years old and my brother's 8 years old, so we help 1 another by washing dishes with lots of soap." Kathy and Carl are washing their own plates, bowls, cups and silverware with lots of soap. Kathy (off screen): "Soap kills off all of the terrible and horrible germs that can make everybody sick and nauseous." Kathy (off screen): "1st we wash the plates, then the bowls, then the cups, and last but not least, the silverware. the dishes are all nice and shiny clean." End of live film....... Elmo: "Elmo knows a lot more about soap, Dorothy knows more about soap, that's exactly why Dorothy wants us to sing The Soap Song." Elmo: On Piano Keys Soap, soap, soap soap, soap, soap soap, soap, soap soap, soap Elmo (continued): soap, soap, soap soap, soap, '' ''soap, soap soap, soap soap, soap soap, sooooooooap Elmo: la dee da '' ''dee dum dee da dee doo that's Elmo's World. Closing Segment: Brought to you by the letter I and the number 37 Alan: "Well, James, I bet if I move from Sesame Street to Hawaii to become a stage actor, you can be the next owner for this store." James: "Oh yeah, Alan, I'm a trained professional just like my late father and my late uncle as well." Big Bird: "Well, Mr. Hooper, you and Alan are such hard workers." James: "Thanks a bunch, Big Bird," Alan: "Any single time." Big Bird: "Good thing I'm keeping that picture drawing I made of the late and other Mr. Hooper by memory right above my nest." Placido Flamingo (off screen): "Sesame Street was brought to you by the letter I and the number 37." A memorial dedication reads: In Memoriam: ''Kermit Love (1916-2008), Alaina Reed Hall (1946-2009), the great Jerry Nelson (1934-2012), Judy Freudberg (1949-2012), Emily Squires (1941-2012), Diana Birkenfield (1926-2012), Leonard Jackson (1928-2013), Lisa Simon (1951-2015), Michael Earl Davis (1951-2015) and David Langston Smyrl (1935-2016). '' Category:Sesame Street season 51 episode scripts